They call me a living stone. They once called Jesus one, because he died but then came back. Maybe, one day I will come back. A year ago, I died only a silent death, it was a quiet ceremony and a closed casket. For I was the only one that attended. It was a beautiful ceremony at only eighteen years of age. The eulogy read for a young girl, a dreamer, a lovely soul that sought out to change the world, become a leader, a voice for those who could not speak. They talk of the girl who was born too soon for her time. The saying is Gods sends his mightiest warriors to go through the toughest battles but only she did not return.
A couple months before she went to a temple where she met a woman, her mentor. The woman wanted to knock her down and rebuild the girl in her image. But the girl showed up to each whipping with a will of iron determined to prove herself to this woman. Each whipping took more of her light and hopes for each time the woman showed up with more cavalry to help decorate her bare back. But the girl did not stop trying to prove herself for she faced many battles. However, the beatings soon became mental, and her mind became a disease while she was focused on keeping her body guarded, she had left her mind defenseless. The woman became an inner voice, along with her cavalry. The drugs they gave her weakened her senses. The girl soon turned to self-isolation, drugs, alcohol, anything to numb the voices. The woman told the world of the story of how they were not to be around the girl for they too could catch her disease. Each day the girl walked the same streets alone, turning to anyone who would offer her a fleeting sense of escape. The loneness, self-hate, depression, and echos became too much for her alone. For the lovely soul on January twelfth could not endure the women for another term. Even though the casket stays empty the scars are enough evidence of the silent death, of her body would not leave this earthly plane, but her soul did. Maybe, one day she will come back. Until then I wait and leave flowers by her stone praying for her resurrection.
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